If you don't ask, you'll never know
by misssophie23
Summary: Jay and Antonio are alone at the office and so Jay takes his change and talks to Dawson about that Erin and he are in a kind of a relationship and gets some whise advice from his friend who isn't really surprise about them being together. [one shot x DAWSON & HALSTEAD x mentalk]


A/N: Hello folks :) Here comes my new one shot. It's an anon request (like the most of my writings) and well, in my head it was better … as I read the request I had a cool idea and then it was gone :/ I hope you'll like this version and the men talk anyways ^^

Let's hope for some Linstead action in the new episode ;)

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything!**

**If you don't ask, you'll never know**

It was nearly 8.00 pm and everybody was already gone. Everybody except Dawson and Halstead who were still sitting at their desks, doing paper work. Jay had to clear the paperwork on his table, otherwise Voight would put him on desk duty for the next week and that was something Jay would happily pass on. His colleague's desk was clear but Antonio had been hovering over a file for a while, frowning every now and again or searching for something in his desk.

"Why are you still here?" Halstead asked his colleague, glancing across the room at Dawson's desk.

"I have to work on this file and I can't go home until I've finished it." Antonio answered without looking up, but didn't ask Jay for his reason of staying.

"Ah …" the younger man said, telling the other one the reason he didn't ask for. "Voight said he wanted to be able to see my desk when he comes in the morning." Halstead smirked, sighing soundlessly as Dawson didn't react at all and turned his eyes back on the file.

"Huh, he isn't much better than mine." Jay mumbled as he looking from his boss's dirty desk to Antonio who chuckled without looking up again from the paper he was working on.

"Yeah, but he is the boss, so ..." the detective joked and this time Jay chuckled at his coworkers words, before he focused back on his work. There was an enjoyable silence between the men, but while Dawson was fully concentrating, Halstead was always glancing across the room. He opened his mouth often to say something but never spoke. He bit his lip. He had to tell someone. He felt how the words wanted to burst out of his mouth; he wanted to tell the whole world.

Once again Jay opened his mouth but instead of telling Antonio his secret he asked him if he wanted another cup of coffee. Dawson took a short look into his mug, which was nearly empty then he glanced at the watch and nodded. "Yeah, that would be great." He would have to stay a little while longer so a new coffee would be a good thing to keep him up. Jay got up, taking the cup in his other hand and vanished into the kitchen corner.

A few moments later the detective put the coffee on Dawson's desk and took a seat on Lindsay's desk. "Thank you." Dawson said, grabbed his mug, leaning back into the chair and looking at Halstead. Jay looked up. He wanted to tell him … he had to tell someone. And from everyone in this unit it was Dawson he trusted the most.

"What's wrong Halstead?" Antonio could tell that the younger man had something on his mind. Something that bothered him. Jay bit his bottom lip before he grabbed Erin's chair, pulling it near to Dawson's desk and sat down. He put his coffee on the table and breathed in and out.

"Can I tell you something? Something that has to stay between us?" asked Jay and his look was serious.

"Of course." Dawson nodded with a furrowed brow, not know what could be so important that he wasn't allowed to talk about it.

Jay licked his lips, before he spoke: "Erin and I … we're … we're having a thing. We're kind of a relationship." In the same seconds he spoke these words, his heartbeat skyrocketed. He looked at his coworker's face, who was starting to grin, before it turned into a short loud laughter.

"What's so funny about it?" Jay asked confused by Dawson's reaction.

"Well, the others owned my twenty bucks … each." The detective grinned and his mood just got better as he saw Halstead's face. Who was completely shocked.

Jay blinked. Did he just hear right? His coworkers had bets on Erin and him? That was disgusting! But also totally them. "But you remember that you have to keep this a secret." Jay reminded the man and couldn't help but sound a little bit nervous. The grin on the man's face vanished immediately.

"You are right … damn it. I could really use the money." Dawson mumbled and took a short sip of his coffee. Then his brows furrowed. "Wait – kind of relationship? What does that mean?"

Halstead cleared his throat and looked at his colleague awkwardly. "Well … we didn't talk about it. We were hanging out during most of our free time together, watching games, having fun like always and since a few weeks we started having sex. It's like a relationship, I think. But, well, like I said, we've never talked about it if we are together like a couple or just friends with benefits."

And that was what bothered him so much. Even though he was a lucky man because he spent most nights with a beautiful woman, when he was thought about it, it bothered him, that they weren't official. And not only because Voight would kill him if he found out. They weren't official because they never talked about the thing they were having. Because they weren't sure if it was the right thing.

Antonio watched his colleague carefully. He could see that Halstead's mind was racing. That it bothered him. Dawson sighed quietly as he leant his forearms on his desk, glancing at the younger man. Maybe he just needed some advice. Honest words from a friend, because that was what they were. They were coworkers and friends. They were like a family. Also he thought that Halstead and Lindsay would make a great couple, they already were at work. Of course Dawson knew that Voight wouldn't be happy about it. Of course he knew that it would be complicated because they were seeing each other all the time, but nevertheless, maybe his words would help them to figure it out.

"Listen to me Halstead … a relationship, no matter how beautiful it is, should never be secret. Of course, at first it makes it fun to hide and sneak around, but when you aren't official you can never have dinner together or watching a movie. It's not real. It's like you are living in your own world … It doesn't matter what your reasons for hiding are, one day you have to decide if you want to go public or if you want to keep it a secret. But believe me, the second option isn't a real good one.

"How do I know what is the right decision? I mean, I like Erin. I like her a lot and I am not afraid of Voight, I don't care about him … but … I am afraid that it won't work out if we make it official." sighed Halstead and rubbed his neck.

"You don't know. If you don't ask, you'll never know." Dawson told him.

"So you're suggesting just jumping in head first? I mean, didn't you know that Laura is the right one?" Jay asked in disbelief and was more shocked as Antonio shook his head with a small laughter.

"God Halstead no. No I didn't know. You never have guaranty that it will work out. Never! And honestly, I didn't believe in that soul mate thing. It's bullshit. Being in a relationship is always risky, but when you are looking at her and her smile makes your heart race like hell, when you always wanted to come home, even after a big fight, and when you can tell her everything, I mean really everything, then you will take the risk. You will take the risk and try to make it work. You don't care what other people are thinking or saying. You are trying to give it your best because that's how a real relationship works. It works! Sure, at the beginning everything is easy and fine, but that's not real love. Real love is when you are fighting together against the world. When you are always have each other's backs and when you can't fall asleep without the other one.

Love isn't just funny and sexy. Love is hard and unfair. Sometimes it totally sucks and even when you are giving it your best, sometimes it isn't enough and it won't work out. But for that to happen you have to take the first step Jay – you have to find out what you're both expecting from the other. From your relationship. No matter what Voight would say or what influence it might have on us. Finding out what you want, talking to her and then getting yourself ready to leave your bubble and becoming official. Like I said, maybe it won't work out, but I can promise you that it won't if you aren't going to talk about your relationship. And give it a try. A real try. Because secrets have a cost and believe me, they are not worth it to lose something you love … or someone."

Both men exchanged a look. Halstead was totally surprised to get something like that from Dawson. They both had a good friendship, but nevertheless he never thought of getting such an advice from him. Jay nodded his head slowly. He got what Tony wanted to tell him. And he knew that he was right. That Erin and he had to talk about what they wanted. Jay licked his lips and for the first time his eyes fell on Dawson's desk more precisely. He frowned as he saw that Antonio wasn't working on a file, he was drawing weird things on a pad.

Jay looked at his friend, who rubbed his head awkwardly, before he started to explain: "Laura and I had a fight this morning. And I don't want to go home, because we would continue fighting. So I decided to stay here as long as I can."

"Huh … and what's about wanting to go home to her even after a big fight?" Jay asked the black-haired man skeptically.

"Did I say that?" asked Antonio and managed a small, awkward laugh.

Jay nodded.

"Well … cancel that!" The man grinned and after a few seconds both were start to laughing out loud.


End file.
